My Favorite Animal

13 Aug

Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, “Fried chicken.”

She said I wasn’t funny, but she couldn’t have been right, because everyone else laughed.

My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal.

I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals very much.

I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and beef. Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal’s office.

I told him what happened, and he laughed, too. Then he told me not to do it again.

The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was.

I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, so I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken.

She sent me back to the principal’s office. He laughed, and told me not to do it again.

I don’t understand. My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn’t like it when I am.

Today, my teacher asked me to tell her what famous person I admired most. I told her, “Colonel Sanders.”

Guess where I am now…

15 Responses to “My Favorite Animal”

  1. Jay in Ames August 13, 2012 at 8:53 am #

    Mmm, now I want to make a beer butt chicken.

  2. Jay in Ames August 13, 2012 at 9:01 am #

    Cute pictures of “The Blade Runner”:

    http://www.dailygood.org/view.php?sid=293

  3. Jay in Ames August 13, 2012 at 9:11 am #

    Wow, Morning Jolt starts out with a bang, courtesy of Mary Katherine Ham:

    It will be about the budget and the $16-trillion debt, the unsustainable trajectory of the federal government and the promises it’s already breaking to generations to come. It will be about Simpson-Bowles and a federal government that hasn’t even bothered to pass a budget since before the iPad existed.

  4. LC Aggie Sith August 13, 2012 at 1:27 pm #

    No, I ain’t ded.

    Great joke, J’Ames 😀 Sad but there are teachers just like that, too.

    Also, on vacay, and I can’t post pics from this laptop for some reason, so I can’t do my picture poats.

    *stabs Windows 7 Starter*

  5. Jay in Ames August 13, 2012 at 2:00 pm #

    Windows 7 Starter? I thought you were a linux gal? Or just get a new laptop?

  6. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 13, 2012 at 6:51 pm #

    I’ll be on vacay this weekend – Mr. TiFW and I are escaping to a posh local hotel for the weekend to celebrate our 32nd anniversary (which will actually take place NEXT week, but we already had plans for that weekend).

    DD#3 agreed to watch Rebecca while we are out – we promised not to come back with another sibling in the oven….

  7. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 13, 2012 at 8:15 pm #

    The Onion does a Paul Ryan “OpEd”; hits it out of the park:

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/admit-it-i-scare-the-everloving-shit-out-of-you-do,29160/

  8. Jay in Ames August 13, 2012 at 8:19 pm #

    we promised not to come back with another sibling in the oven….

    Practice makes perfect!

  9. LC Aggie Sith August 13, 2012 at 10:39 pm #

    I am a Linux afficionado, but I took the mini on the trip. A little HP Mini 210-1190R.

    Little fucker… GAH!!! I shoulda brought the Linux Lummox™.

  10. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 14, 2012 at 1:03 pm #

    Ugh – our dear old dog is on “Death Watch”. She hasn’t been eating or drinking, she’s lost a lot of weight, but she is still hanging in there and not in any discernible pain. I don’t want to put her down if she doesn’t appear to be suffering. She keeps walking up and down the stairs with us each night/morning.

    We’re just making her comfortable, and hoping that the end is peaceful.

    I really hate this…..

  11. Jay in Ames August 14, 2012 at 1:55 pm #

    Last Saturday afternoon, in Washington , D.C. , an aide to the former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic cathedral in D.C. He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the next day’s Mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.

    The Cardinal replied, “No. I don’t really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Pelosi’s views.”

    Pelosi’s aide then said, “Look, I’ll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 to your church if you’ll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint.”

    The Cardinal thought about it and said, “Well, the church can use the money, so I’ll work your request into tomorrow’s sermon.”

    As Pelosi’s aide promised, Nancy Pelosi appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle. As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Nancy Pelosi was present.

    The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, “While Nancy Pelosi’s presence is probably an honor to some; the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip- flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self -absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both in Washington , and in California . The woman is simply not to be trusted.”

    The Cardinal concluded, “But, when compared with President Obama, Nancy Pelosi is a saint.”

    Boy, I love being around Catholics…

  12. Jay in Ames August 14, 2012 at 2:39 pm #

    146 Obama’s fair stop Monday evening required shutdown of the popular Bud Tent, the heart of fairgrounds nightlife. Fairgoers eager to greet the president were ushered inside, screened and scanned by the Secret Service and penned in by yellow caution tape.

    There are “two sides to this story,” said Mike Cunningham II, the third generation owner of the 65-year-old Bud Tent.

    On one hand, Cunningham, 39, appreciated the historical significance of Obama’s visit: His great-grandfather, Lloyd Cunningham, was secretary of the fair board from 1942 to 1962 and was on hand to greet then-President Dwight Eisenhower when he visited the centennial fair in 1954 with Iowa’s own President Herbert Hoover in tow. (That was the first of four visits by sitting presidents, followed by Gerald Ford in 1975, George W. Bush in 2002 and Obama on Monday.)

    On the other hand, the small business owner side of Cunningham fumes that the president “put a damper on what I’m trying to do here.” His Bud Tent was shut down at the most lucrative time of day, with a popular rock cover band, Hairball, about to perform at the Susan B. Knapp Amphitheater next door with legions of thirsty fans.

    “I was in a position to make a campaign donation against my will,” said Cunningham, a Republican.

    Posted by: Islamic Rage Boy at August 14, 2012 01:59 PM (e8kgV)

    Man, that would SUCK! Having to host the president of the opposing party, and losing money in the process.

    Could he have refused? Although that would have made the news, too, and pissed off the other side of his clientele.

  13. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 14, 2012 at 4:18 pm #

    DD#2 called this afternoon to tell me “I’m not dead….” (she lives in College Station, where the shootings were – YESTERDAY)

    Um….yeah. I already talked to your girlfriend…..YESTERDAY…..but thanks for the heads-up…..(get a working charger for your cell phone, wouldja?)

    She also informed me that she and Rheah might be in town this weekend – the same weekend that we had planned on being sans kids (and pants) for 3 glorious days.

    FML.

  14. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 14, 2012 at 6:09 pm #

    When the kids won’t return Granny’s call, give Granny the boyfriend/girlfriend’s phone number…..

    http://teresainfortworth.wordpress.com/2012/08/14/goin-full-grandma/

  15. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX August 14, 2012 at 6:19 pm #

    It’s Shark Week:

    http://is.gd/l5I3wl

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: