Latest healthcare news

5 May

If  you can’t afford a doctor, go to an airport – you’ll get a  free x-ray and a breast exam.

If you mention Al Qaeda,  you’ll get a free colonoscopy.

critical update (GMLand): For better heart health:


Important Update (TiFW): Ladies, this fella is willing to provide a VERY valuable service at a price that can’t be beat:

IMPOTENT UPDATE FOR GUY S:

288 Responses to “Latest healthcare news”

  1. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 9:04 am #

    I am leaving a comment.

  2. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:05 am #

    Well, we needed somethin’ new for a poat.

  3. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 9:07 am #

    Don’t get me wrong, this poat kicks the ass of a thousand Titans, its just missing that certain something…

    *looks at hoors chest on far left*

  4. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:10 am #

    Feel free to update this, GMLand. A woman doing a breast self-exam, IYKWIMAITYD.

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 9:15 am #

      RIP, Jackie.

  5. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 9:14 am #

    Thanks for the morning laugh, Roamy! Glad you all made it home safe and sound, and glad you have power restored.

    It really put things in perspective when I was reading some of the tweets from that fellow over in Pakistan who “live-tweeted” the raid – he was talking about how they were lucky to get a few hours of electricity EACH DAY.

    Kinda made me want to round up a bunch of liberals who think this country isn’t all that, airlift them over to that part of the world, and drop them off. Let them see how the rest of the world lives, and then see what they think about the good old USA…

  6. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 9:14 am #

    updated for good heart health.

  7. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:17 am #

    Kinda made me want to round up a bunch of liberals who think this country isn’t all that, airlift them over to that part of the world, and drop them off. Let them see how the rest of the world lives, and then see what they think about the good old USA…

    EXACTLY. If this country is so bad that it must be changed, go somewhere else where it’s already screwed up.

  8. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 9:28 am #

    Updated with important medical news for the ladies….

  9. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 9:36 am #

    Thanks PattyAnn. I *heart* Jackie Cooper, and he will be greatly missed 😦

    And good morning. y’all!

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 9:53 am #

      Aggie, I brought that over from the dying post. CB let us know.

  10. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 9:37 am #

    Teresa, we need to round them up, AND LEAVE THEM THERE.

    FORFUCKINGEVER!!!!!!!!

  11. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 9:42 am #

    Big Journalism: Color of Change Claims It Runs MSNBC’s Programming Decisions

    I’m getting really sick of being called a racist. Breitbart is also not a racist. Nobody I know is a racist. Yet here we are.

  12. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:45 am #

    I am celebrating running the dishwasher.

  13. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 9:48 am #

    Wow, roamy, I ran the dishwasher before I went to work.

    Small world.

  14. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 9:49 am #

    Nobody I know is a racist.

    I am!

    Good morning. 🙂

  15. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:51 am #

    J’ames, you have no idea how sick and tired I was of handwashing dishes for 6 people.

    Also, my dad is a racist. Holy hell, did I want him to STFU several times. It was embarrassing. Mom would have said, “Now, honey…” and kept him in line, but stepmom doesn’t have that skill yet.

  16. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 9:55 am #

    My grandfather was a racist. It was very satisfying for me, when he came to visit us when Dad was stationed in Michigan. The family we were closest to there was black. It’s not easy to be a racist around a PhD divinity school lady, and a Lt Col Military Policeman from Harlem.

    Good times, good times.

  17. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 9:58 am #

    J’Ames, never trust anything with “Color” in the title. Not even Behr paint.

  18. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 10:05 am #

    That would not even slow down my dad. Once in high school, I invited a friend over to my house, and he let it be known that he was not going to have a black person at the dinner table.

    **cringe

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 10:09 am #

      Roomy, that goes both ways. My best friend in 6th grade was black and I was invited to dinner. She neglected to tell her parents that I was white and her father disinvited me shortly after I arrived.

  19. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:07 am #

    J’Ames, never trust anything with “Color” in the title. Not even Behr paint.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

    Happy Cinco de Mayo, Ags. I know it doesn’t mean much to a Texarican, but I’m sure the common language allows you to co-opt the celebration, much like we Americans do with the British “Boxing Day.”

    Good times… Good times… 😛

  20. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:09 am #

    I invited a friend over to my house, and he let it be known that he was not going to have a black person at the dinner table.

    My father would never say that to a black person – he’s no racist! Now, a Zionist (read “Jew”) would be a different story….

  21. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:12 am #

    Happy Cinco de Mayo, Ags.

    YOU TAKE THAT BACK, YOU SWINE!!!! 😛

    Seriously, I do not celebrate or condone it, seeing as it is a Mexican holiday used for the express purpose of division here. In fact, I told my kids if they were asked to celebrate it in anyway at school, to politely decline, and let them know that as Americans, they do not celebrate foreign holidays.

    Heh….heh….heh….

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 10:14 am #

      Heh. Aggie called Jazz a swine.

  22. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:14 am #

    G. Bus Shyster, John McCain makes me NUTS. The fucking grim reaper’s been falling down on the job lately. COME PICK UP YOUR PACKAGE, YOU LAZY FUCKING BAG OF BONES!!!

    McCain told reporters leaving an intelligence briefing for senators by CIA director Leon Panetta that he has seen no information so far to indicate that techniques like waterboarding factored significantly in the information gathering that led to bin Laden’s death.

  23. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 10:15 am #

    Patty Ann, it does indeed go both ways. Rocketboy was at the Army summer camp the year after 3rd grade. He couldn’t figure out why just being white was enough reason for the black kids to not let him play basketball with them. “Mom, what does that have to do with anything?”

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 10:19 am #

      I’m sorry rocketbpy had that life lesson so young, Roamy.

      Yay! Autocorrect fixed Roamy! It recognized you. I would feel very afraid 🙂

  24. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 10:15 am #

    Glenn Beck is telling part of the Operation Red Wing story right now. The part about letting the goatherder and his son go.

    Still gives me goosebumps.

  25. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:16 am #

    YO SOY NO PUERCO!!!!!

    Seriously, I do not celebrate or condone it,

    I do – I call it “Stencho de Mayo” – Mexican food gives me radioactive gas. 😉

  26. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:21 am #

    e House voted Tuesday to eliminate federal grant money intended to help states establish their own insurance exchanges. The measure passed 238-183 after Republicans dismissed complaints that the bill would tie states’ hands and shift power to the federal government.

    http://tinyurl.com/6c8p93r

  27. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:22 am #

    He couldn’t figure out why just being white was enough reason for the black kids to not let him play basketball with them.

    I swear, if they told him “White men can’t jump”, I will go machete on someone.

  28. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 10:22 am #

    Heh. I definitely like Roamy better than Roomy. 😀

  29. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:26 am #

    Stencho de mayo”

    I think Dick will give you a run for your money 😆

  30. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:26 am #

    Osama was AWESOME!!!!

    Aday before the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, it was still possible to believe in the future, like a religion of infinite promise. With the collapse of the Soviet Union more than a decade before, history had supposedly come to an end. The age of great ideological conflict was over. Technology, prosperity and global connectedness were leading us to an evolutionary leap in consciousness. Perhaps prosperity and politics weren’t cyclical and erratic, perhaps a new global consensus on capitalism and democracy would knit the fractious world together into unities unimaginable in the bygone ages of heroes, kings and other autocrats.

    One man dispelled all of that, casting the world simultaneously backward and forward with a single morning of destruction. He refreshed old ideas about history, religion and the role of epic players in the course of human events. The concept of evil had a new lease on life, and suddenly, for better and for worse, larger-than-life actors again bestrode the stage of history. He made so many atavistic ideas once again respectable that the world felt new and different, engulfed in a fresh age of apocalypse.

  31. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 10:32 am #

    J’Ames – the fact that Marcus was the final decision on the goatherder’s survival is absolutely gut wrenching.

  32. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 10:34 am #

    Mike Pence is running for Indiana Governor. Via WOWO in Ft Wayne.

  33. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:35 am #

    Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler’s abortion story: http://tinyurl.com/3m4w92z

  34. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:36 am #

    According to cops, Dexter White, 41, called 911 to report that he paid his dealer $60 for crack cocaine, but had received only $20 worth of the drug. White contacted police with his consumer complaint around 4:30 AM Friday (an hour at which Better Business Bureau operators apparently were not standing by).

    A North Charleston Police Department report notes that White, in a written statement, identified his supplier as “C,” and said the drug dealer refused his demand for “his $40 in change.” He added that he smoked the entire $20 worth of crack before calling 911.

    http://tinyurl.com/6depyal

  35. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    A 17-year-old was charged Thursday after eggs were thrown at Canadian pop sensation Justin Bieber during a concert in Australia, police said.

    http://tinyurl.com/6kofqal

  36. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    I can’t imagine what Marcus feels, and don’t ever want to have to deal with that decision.

    Once again, I can only hope to be half the man Marcus Luttrell is.

  37. GuyS May 5, 2011 at 10:38 am #

    I have celebrated “Cinco de Mayo” for 56 years, starting long before it was the “manufactured” holiday it is today….I prefer to call it “Cinco de Guyo!”!

  38. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:40 am #

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUY!!!!!

    *Sloppy kisses and squishy hugs*

  39. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 10:41 am #

    Since today is a celebration of alcoholic consumption:

  40. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:42 am #

    I have celebrated “Cinco de Mayo” for 56 years, starting long before it was the “manufactured” holiday it is today….I prefer to call it “Cinco de Guyo!”!

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUY!!!!!

    Dude – I totally missed that! You’re too fecking subtle, Guy. 😀

  41. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 10:44 am #

    Happy Birthday Guy!

    (Which “Guy’s” birthday is it again?)

  42. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 10:45 am #

    A 17-year-old was charged Thursday after eggs were thrown at Canadian pop sensation Justin Bieber during a concert in Australia, police said.

    Charged? That person deserves a MEDAL….

  43. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 10:47 am #

    I celebrate mine on Ocho de Mayo…. every year!

  44. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:48 am #

    Both Guys have birthdays in May??

    Coincidence?? I think NOT!!!!

  45. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 10:50 am #

    I can’t imagine what Marcus feels, and don’t ever want to have to deal with that decision.

    Once again, I can only hope to be half the man Marcus Luttrell is.

    – – – – – –

    You can see it in his eyes, he lives with it everyday. I have got to sit down and talk with him a few times and its just…. there. Don’t even know how to explain it really.

    but, ditto.

  46. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:51 am #

    Any of y’all live near a river? How’s the flooding this year? I’ll take pics in the next few days of the Grand (this town’s namesake) – the flood plain is SWAMPED. I’ve never seen the kind of water I see this year.

  47. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:52 am #

    Charged? That person deserves a MEDAL….

    Hahahahha! I think everyone thinks that except Justine and the cops that protect her.

  48. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:54 am #

    IMPOTENT UPDATE!!!!!

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 10:58 am #

      Happy birthday, Guys!

  49. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:55 am #

    You gals may love’m, but I hate those cork wedge shoes y’all wear! I want to pin pictures and notes and kids’ corrected spelling tests to them when you walk past.

  50. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:57 am #

    What smells like mothballs and beef-barley soup in here?

    Oh… Hey, Guys!!!! 😀

  51. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:58 am #

    Jazz, I hate those shoes. Never did like the “wedge” style, and as for cork, it is best in a bottle of olive oil. Or wine.

  52. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 10:59 am #

    Never did like the “wedge” style

    Hahahahah! You’re so awesome. Didja ever give one of your kids a wedgie? ‘Cause I would put up a shrine to you if you did. 😛

  53. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 11:04 am #

    I promised Rocketboy an atomic wedgie if he ever wore his pants low enough for me to see his underwear.

  54. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 11:05 am #

    I also promised spackle if I ever saw any crack.

  55. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 11:05 am #

    I promised Rocketboy an atomic wedgie if he ever wore his pants low enough for me to see his underwear.

    ❤ 🙂

  56. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 11:07 am #

    Man, you need a rope and trail of breadcrumbs to follow the White House bin Laden narrative.

    http://tinyurl.com/685j5hu

    It’s like following fucking Billy on one of his epic jaunts in a Family Circus panel.

  57. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 11:08 am #

    My son is not allowed to ‘sag’ either. Not that he would, but he knows my methods of discipline and wouldn’t want a worn, leathery looking ass sticking out of his jeans anyway.

  58. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 11:10 am #

    Somebody’s spouse made white chocomacnut cookies today. I’m abusing that plate.

  59. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 11:15 am #

    Leave the plate alone, perv. Just have a cookie!

  60. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 11:24 am #

    Didja ever give one of your kids a wedgie?

    All three of them. And son was hanged from the doorknob by his underwear for being a stubborn jackass when he was five.

  61. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 11:29 am #

    I’m getting really sick of being called a racist. Breitbart is also not a racist. Nobody I know is a racist. Yet here we are.

    Yes you do. His name is Rosetta, and after reading his confession, I realized I was too.

    Besides, some dope at Nice Deb’s confirmed it yesterday.

  62. GuyS May 5, 2011 at 11:31 am #

    Thank you all! * notes GM and I are the only two “Guys” here!” More pie for us!! And yes, of course our b-days are in the same month, bookends as it were. Us guys are clannish that way.

  63. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 11:32 am #

    I promised Rocketboy an atomic wedgie if he ever wore his pants low enough for me to see his underwear.

    Several years ago, when DD#1 was still living at home and Rebecca was still a little tyke, DD#1 learned a VERY valuable lesson.

    Y’see, for whatever reason, she liked to wear thong underwear. And the “style” of the day was low-cut jeans. Now, mean old mom wouldn’t let the jeans be TOO low-cut, but they would still ride low whenever the girl sat down. I had to keep reminding her to pull her shirts down, because the “thong” always stayed in place, and there’s just some things that you don’t want people to see when it’s your daughter.

    One day, DD#1 sits down on the couch right next to Rebecca, and I was too tired to say anything (but I laughed my ass off as I watched this all unfold). The shirt rode up, the pants rode down, and the thong was exposed in all its glory.

    For a toddler, that “string” was just too tempting a target.

    Never did have to remind DD#1 to pull her shirt down again….

  64. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 11:37 am #

    Thank you all! * notes GM and I are the only two “Guys” here!” More pie for us!! And yes, of course our b-days are in the same month, bookends as it were. Us guys are clannish that way.

    Bookends, doorstops…they are pretty much the same thing…

  65. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 11:40 am #

    We’ll call this the mother of all narrative fails. The very week that the NYT magazine runs a negative, anti-military cover story with a brooding graphic on the cover, the beast within the heart of the US Navy SEALs takes down the world’s worst terrorist. No kidding.

    http://tinyurl.com/3wtwfet

  66. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 11:44 am #

    Did my obligatory girlie drink of the week, and shout-out to moms.

    Now the countdown to cocktail hour begins….

  67. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 11:57 am #

    Terrible story. Terrible reporting.

    http://tinyurl.com/65azc25

    Who the fuck is Ali?

  68. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:07 pm #

    Wow, Jazz…. amazing what is just completely left out of that story, huh???

    My guess is Ali is a brother?

  69. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:12 pm #

  70. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:14 pm #

    My guess is Ali is a brother?

    Brother… Uncle… Who knows? Ali is a mystery. The comments are interesting. Anti-Moose sentiment doesn’t play well with a large contingent of SE Michiganders.

  71. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:14 pm #

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    That was similar to my FB status 😀

  72. GuyS May 5, 2011 at 12:17 pm #

    Doorstops??!! This from the “sharpest legal mind” of the group? How the mighty have fallen!

    As far as the low riding pants go, the boys here have felt the all powerful effects of “shame”. Their mother and I welded that particular weapon well enough, that looking like whitebread wanna-be rappers was not considered acceptable attire in this house, especially if they were not bringing in the same amounts of money the real rappers were. Also told them if they continued to wear their pants in such a manner, I was going to start walking around in short while wearing black socks and sandals, or worse yet, a speedo with same socks and sandals. Brought the low riding pants action to a quick halt!!

  73. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:18 pm #

    Listen to Mark Levin go! 2:10 of pure American pride and castigation of the chicken shit president.

    http://tinyurl.com/3p35h8t

  74. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:18 pm #

    This from the “sharpest legal mind” of the group?

    Some may take issue with that characterization. 😉

  75. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:19 pm #

    The shrieking is interesting in a “the lady doth protest too much, methinks” kind of way, Jazz.

  76. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:20 pm #

    looking like whitebread wanna-be rappers was not considered acceptable attire in this house, especially if they were not bringing in the same amounts of money the real rappers were

    BWAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

  77. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:41 pm #

    The head of the CIA admitted yesterday that there was no live video footage of the raid on Osama bin Laden’s compound as further doubts emerged about the US version of events.

    Then what were they watching?… A blank screen?

    http://tinyurl.com/3te9dk2

  78. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:43 pm #

    After 52 years of conceiving, testing and waiting, marked by scientific advances and disappointments, one of Stanford’s and NASA’s longest-running projects comes to a close with a greater understanding of the universe.

    Stanford and NASA researchers have confirmed two predictions of Albert Einstein’s general theory of relativity, concluding one of the space agency’s longest-running projects.

    http://tinyurl.com/5vz9tl9

  79. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    Some may take issue with that characterization

    Sure. Some would call “sharpest legal mind” an oxymoron.

    Or maybe it’s something like being the sharpest butter knife?

    🙂

  80. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 12:48 pm #

    Obama apparently was forced into neutralizing bin Laden, and according to this blogger, didn’t even know about the operation until it was underway.

    Well, this explains the photo and why the President is not sitting at the head of the table:

    The operation was at this time effectively unknown to President Barack Obama or Valerie Jarrett and it remained that way until AFTER it had already been initiated. President Obama was literally pulled from a golf outing and escorted back to the White House to be informed of the mission.

    How embarrassing. Whoever snapped that shot and let it out just confirmed all of this.

    http://tinyurl.com/5wwbgce

  81. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:51 pm #

    Then what were they watching?… A blank screen?

    Family Feud?? 😉

  82. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 12:53 pm #

    Jazz, I wrote a little about Gravity Probe-B over at XBrad’s place. Also, today is the 50th anniversary of Alan Shepard’s flight on Freedom 7.

  83. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 12:55 pm #

    Jazz, fix the last link 😉

  84. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 1:00 pm #

    http://tinyurl.com/4xkodef

    One local caller described bin Laden’s slaying as “a great day of shame for the American people.” He said Obama had endorsed a “state-sponsored assassination team to go in like the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre and kill bin Laden, his brother, the women that were there and then dispose of his body at sea. This is one of the worst days that I’ve experienced.”

    Another caller said bin Laden was in fact a witness in the Sept. 11 attacks. By killing him, the U.S. government had resorted to “killing a witness,” raising suspicions that 9/11 was “an inside job.” . . .

    But Ayala said he understood the euphoria that erupted on the East Coast. “Over there, it’s different,” he said. “They were right in the midst of it. I don’t blame them at all. They got every right to celebrate. You know, that was a big day, 2001. So why not?”

    Yeah – a big day. What. The. Fuck. Does shit on your dick fuck up your basic perspective of right and wrong? Of justice? We ought to just fucking nuke the SA Fault and slide that piece of shit real estate into the fucking ocean. I fucking hate California.

  85. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 1:02 pm #

    Some may take issue with that characterization.

    Maybe, but Michael hasn’t been around lately to object.

  86. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 1:06 pm #

    Ags, the link is fixed.

  87. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 1:10 pm #

    My goddamned drunken Mick fucking piece of shit uncle just fucked me nine ways from Sunday. I’m so goddamn pissed I could fucking spit. Goddamit. Goddamn fucking greedy, self-centered fucking shithead self-entitled fucking drunks. Goddammit. Free legal services are over. Fuck him

    I’m so fucking pissed. I won’t fucking be back around today.

  88. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 1:18 pm #

    Jazz, can I borrow some money?

    Too soon?

  89. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 1:43 pm #

    GML kilt the poat…

    *throws girlie drink at GML*

  90. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 1:47 pm #

    *uses super ninja skills and deflects it to Biw*

    *hits him right in the poon*

    *he runs away like a bitch*

    *cracks open a beer and scratches self in celebration*

  91. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 1:49 pm #

    *he runs away like a bitch*

    So I was right in throwing a girlie drink…

    *takes BisW’s Man Card™ away*

  92. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 2:24 pm #

    *double taps poat*

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 2:50 pm #

      *releases picture of dead poat*

  93. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 2:51 pm #

    *photoshopped, don’t believe it*

    • PattyAnn May 5, 2011 at 2:53 pm #

      But it’s from THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION

  94. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 2:55 pm #

    Bzzzt, wrong answer.

    Obama Administration doesn’t release photos.

    Book her, Danno!

  95. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

    Obama Administration doesn’t release photos.

    Generally, they have the AP or Rueters do it for them.

  96. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

    *takes BisW’s Man Card™ away*

    You couldn’t LIFT my Man Card.

  97. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

    No, no…PattyAnn leaked it. It’s legit.

  98. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 2:59 pm #

    You couldn’t LIFT my Man Card.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

    Oh, my….

  99. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 3:08 pm #

    I take it Jazz is unhappy?

  100. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:09 pm #

    Job’s finished, double beef mustard whopper w/cheese is not, but will be soon.

  101. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 3:09 pm #

    You couldn’t LIFT my Man Card.

    All I wanna know is, what’s the credit limit on that sucker?

    ‘Cuz mama needs a new pair of shoes….

  102. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 3:10 pm #

    You couldn’t LIFT my Man Card.

    ‘Cause he had it tattoo’d onto his chest.

  103. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:11 pm #

    If you woulda said Whataburger, Dick… I’da been dry humping air.

  104. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:12 pm #

    I had some Girl scouts take my man card. They called me a pussy as they left.

  105. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:13 pm #

    Guy, for some odd reason, I’m kinda burned on Whataburger lately.
    I think it’s our local one that’s left me not really wanting them.

  106. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:15 pm #

    I will take up arms and use them if this happens.
    http://thehill.com/blogs/floor-action/house/159397-obama-floats-plan-to-tax-cars-by-the-mile

    Not a threat, but rather a promise.

  107. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:16 pm #

    I will be in Texas in 2 weeks, feasting at every Whataburger I go by!!!!

  108. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:17 pm #

    Do yourself a favor and steer clear of the one in Euless off 183.

  109. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:18 pm #

    10-4

  110. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:19 pm #

    Dick, looks like I’ve scored a big development in Prosper. Going to be going through there to meet the developer and see the property.

    Beers?

  111. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:22 pm #

    Damn right. When do ya think you’re headed this way?

  112. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:24 pm #

    leave here Sunday the 15th – waiting to confirm whether I meet with him on the way there or on the way back. Heading to Houston as well.

  113. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:27 pm #

    Soooo sweet!
    Steal this for 79K and you can afford whatever needs repairing.
    http://www.greatrealestate.com/ListingDetail.aspx?LID=21235657&MLSID=262&MetroAreaID=224

  114. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:28 pm #

    Very cool, Guy. I’m emailing my phone number. Just give me a bit of a heads up.

  115. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:28 pm #

    Okay. I’m still churlish, but here’s the deal:

    I have an uncle (last name “Casey” – fucking mick) who is an electrician, a drunk, and exceptionally self-entitled. He’s also got a very subjective value system. I’ve done legal work for him several times over the past decade, as has my lawyer brother, and I’ve never charged him a dime. He once was caught by the agency that administers Michigan’s unemployment benefits for fraudulently claiming almost $7,000 in unemployment benefits while he was working on the side, for which he was ordered to pay restitution and fined $22,000. I was able to negotiate his punishment down to restitution plus a fine of $4,000, and I charged him the low, low price of zero dollars. I’ve handled miscellaneous legal matters for him, too, e.g., the incorporation of his business. I never charged for those matters, either.

    As more background, he used to play intermediary for me in acquiring things that were hard to get. A half dozen people reported to me that he was stealing from me and bragging that it didn’t matter, because I had a good job and could afford it.

    Lately, he’s taken to speaking to me with spite and palpable contempt – I mean the kind of contempt that makes you want to just hang up and not take any more calls from the guy. I don’t know what his deal is, but he’s really not pleasant for me to spend time around, which sucks, because for fifteen years, he was my best friend and we were inseparable (he’s only four years older than me).

    A few weeks ago, I needed some electrical work done for a cottage-industry business I’ve invested in. So, I called Dickface Casey, Master Electrician Extraordinaire, to do the work for me. I explained what I needed done, and he had it taken care of in 24 hours. He never mentioned payment, and I pretty much assumed (I KNOW!) that it would just be attributed to the barter system, given, you know, that I’d already done shit for him for free – even if it was a long time ago. Wrong.

    About two weeks later, he says he wants $200 for the work he did for me. I kind of put him off, thinking we’d have a chance to talk about it and set things straight, but that opportunity never showed. In the mean time, I need my property inspected and the electrical work approved.

    Right now, the city refuses to inspect the electrical work at the property. Dickface never pulled a permit, which I’m fine with as long as my shit passes inspection, but the city won’t even look at it without a pulled permit. So I called Dickface, and he says he won’t pull the permit without getting the permit fee plus his $200. I’m not inclined to pay him. I do, however, still need my shit inspected.

    So, I’ve got a call in to another electrician friend, and we’re going to get the inspection thing worked out. As far as Dickface goes, master electricians who ply their trade in the absence of a permit are subject to license revocation. Wanna play ball, motherfucker?

  116. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:29 pm #

    will do, I’ll reply with mine.

  117. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:31 pm #

    Sent., From my Contact @ *****.com address.

  118. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 3:35 pm #

    This is gonna win hearts and minds in Wisconsin – disenfranchised nuns:

    http://legalinsurrection.blogspot.com/2011/05/kloppenburgs-first-big-recount-success.html

    Yeppers, ya can’t trust those ladies in the penguin suits…..

  119. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:35 pm #

    Look, I realize I should have talked about his expectations – my fault. But there has never, ever, ever been an exchange of funds for trade/professional work anywhere in my family for anything – from the doctors, lawyers, electricians, CPAs. Nobody charges family. My irritation is not unreasonable. Neither is his desire to get paid, but that’s shit that needs to be addressed up front – especially if you’re deviating from established family practice – not on the back side after the work is done

  120. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:36 pm #

    Jazz, I’ve come away from that story with two distinct impressions.
    First, you need to cut ties with Casey, and ignore any future contact until he tightens up.

    Second, my house is in deep trouble. LMAO!
    Permits? I don’t need no stinkin’ permits!

  121. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:36 pm #

    And I’m done. 🙂

  122. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 3:37 pm #

    DICK!!!!

    *passes tequila, dead hooker, and midget pr0n*

  123. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:37 pm #

    First, you need to cut ties with Casey, and ignore any future contact until he tightens up.

    Already done. I flushed his fucking contacts. And I’m fucking pimping him on his fucking fee, too.

  124. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:38 pm #

    And yes, I am a racist, even to the fucking micks in my own family. 🙂

  125. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 3:38 pm #

    Jazz, sounds like Mr. Casey needs a bat.

    Or maybe he is bipolar.

    But the bat idea is good.

  126. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:40 pm #

    Didja ever watch a friendship melt to nothing in front of your eyes? I just did, and it sucks.

  127. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:42 pm #

    Its happened to me as well Jazz. Designing a house for friends or family can be disastrous. Doesn’t have to be, but it can be and its unfortunate when it is.

    Just always remember….

  128. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 3:43 pm #

    Didja ever watch a friendship melt to nothing in front of your eyes?

    *thinks back to February*

    A few of us have.

  129. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:47 pm #

    Just always remember….

    I know. I was roommates with Dickface for five years. We split a duplex for a total of ten. He took me snipe hunting when I was a kid. He was my best friend. I’ve got a lifetime of memories with him, but the past 18 months have gotten to be unbearable. I have no interest in even trying to patch this up.

  130. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 3:48 pm #

    In other news, I am devouring a Godiva raspberry-filled chocolate bar with all the gusto of a woman who has been given a credit card with no limit.

  131. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:51 pm #

    From the comments at TiFW’s link:

    The same folks who are happy to throw out these nuns’ votes also argue passionately that voters will be disenfranchised if voter ID is required. So they don’t mind making it easy for felons, nonresidents, illegal immigrants or frauds to vote but they applaud that cloistered nuns, who have voted for years without a witness, technically wrong but hardly with intent to commit fraud, have their votes thrown out.

    http://www.jsonline.com/news/statepolitics/121295519.html?page=1#comment66496008

  132. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 3:51 pm #

    Criminy, I’m a fucking drama queen. Maybe I should just get fitted for a dress and a tiara.

  133. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 3:52 pm #

    Jazz, my polite and gentlemanly advice?

    Nail his nuts to the wall. When you fuck over family, the gloves come off.

    And then tell him to have a nice day.

  134. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 3:53 pm #

    No really, its OK princess… we’re here for you.

    *puts on kevlar jock strap*

  135. Dick May 5, 2011 at 3:57 pm #

    Thanks, Aggie!

  136. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm #

    Well, as the family black sheep, I have to say that it might be good to issue forth a bit of “So that’s how its gonna be, huh?”.

    In other news, I just watched the clip of David Barton quietly owning Jon Stewart last night.

    It warmed the cockles of my heart. And I didn’t even know that my heart had cockles.

  137. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm #

    Criminy, I’m a fucking drama queen.

    Speaking as an expert, you don’t even come close to being in the league.

  138. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 4:03 pm #

    wanna get pissed?

    http://www.gutsycall.com/

  139. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm #

    Nail his nuts to the wall. When you fuck over family, the gloves come off.

    You and me, AD – we’re simpatico.

  140. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm #

    *eyes flag counter*

    The Saudis seem to have stopped reading our page.

    Odd, that.

  141. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:05 pm #

    And I didn’t even know that my heart had cockles.

    I didn’t know you had a heart to have cockles in.

  142. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:07 pm #

    WTF, J’Ames???

  143. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:09 pm #

    The Saudis seem to have stopped reading our page.

    Compare that to the Israeli counter, BisW. Tell me if it has gone up.

  144. Dick May 5, 2011 at 4:09 pm #

    Jay, I signed up just so I can hear the bullshit that asshole is spouting.

  145. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 4:10 pm #

    Looks like that name was registered at godaddy, so I seriously doubt it was the White House.

  146. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 4:12 pm #

    I didn’t know you had a heart to have cockles in.

    It was a red construction paper cut-out, given to him by little Sally in the first grade.

  147. Jay in Ames May 5, 2011 at 4:14 pm #

    Oh, Dick, you are gonna be SOOOO pleased you signed up. I’ve been signed up since 2008!

    Joe Biden even sends stuff out!

  148. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:17 pm #

    No really, its OK princess… we’re here for you.

    BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! I missed this! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! 😀

  149. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:17 pm #

    It was a red construction paper cut-out, given to him by little Sally in the first grade.

    Awwww, how cute…. 😆

  150. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:18 pm #

    wanna get pissed?

    Have you read ANY of my posts since 1:10 PM? 😛

  151. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:20 pm #

    The clouds in my soul are clearing. I blame the Guys for mocking me. 😀 I’m laughing at both you fuckers, fuckers. 😀

  152. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:21 pm #

    And everyone else, too. Thanks for tethering me to pseudo-reality.

  153. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:23 pm #

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ErzxOz3Dzv8&feature=player_embedded#at=194

    I wonder if he has a newsletter to which I may subscribe.

  154. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm #

    Awww, Jazz, you can always vent here 🙂

    *gives Jazz a blankie and warm milk*

  155. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:25 pm #

    It was a red construction paper cut-out, given to him by little Sally in the first grade.

    Her name was Katie, and it was third grade.

    Your mocking loses something when it is so glaringly inaccurate.

  156. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 4:26 pm #

    Thanks for tethering me to pseudo-reality.

    You’re welcome. Besides, what else am I gonna do with these extra leashes I have lying around? Gotta use them for something..

  157. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 4:26 pm #

    I’m laughing at both you fuckers, fuckers. 😀

    – – – – –

    and I’m looking at you and your tiara in cautious amusement and guarded aplomb.

    *wordsmith FTW*

  158. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:28 pm #

    and I’m looking at you and your tiara in cautious amusement and guarded aplomb.

    I might be wearing a dress, but I’m not gonna be grabbing your apples or anything. It’s DRAMA.

  159. Dick May 5, 2011 at 4:28 pm #

    Let’s play checkers or have sex.

  160. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:29 pm #

    I wonder if he has a newsletter to which I may subscribe.

    I just ovulated…

  161. GMLand May 5, 2011 at 4:29 pm #

    *sits on Jazz*

    *dangles a loogie over his face*

  162. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm #

    Your mocking loses something when it is so glaringly inaccurate.

    I really do need to get that dossier updated. I don’t know when I can free up the $19.95 again, though.

  163. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm #

    Let’s play checkers or have sex.

    Despite the dress, I vote checkers.

  164. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:33 pm #

    If Guy is gonna meet with Dick, he should probably practice assuming the position. I don’t know if there is anything to be done about the sound of the three pistoned ass hammer firing up, and the look of wide-eyed terror that will come, though.

  165. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 4:35 pm #

    I prefer chess, so I guess you’ll just have to turn around and bend over. Gives new meaning to “check mate”.

  166. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:36 pm #

    I really do need to get that dossier updated. I don’t know when I can free up the $19.95 again, though.

    Tell OFA you’ll do all of their intelligence work in advance of the next election. They are definately “too big to fail”, and despite being flush with cash, no one in government is going to declare them rich and tax their eyeballs out.

  167. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:36 pm #

    *dangles a loogie over his face*

    *violent cup check*

  168. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

    Let’s play checkers or have sex.

    My checkerboard is in the shop.

  169. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

    I prefer chess, so I guess you’ll just have to turn around and bend over. Gives new meaning to “check mate”.

    I refuse your false choice, Obama Dog. And I’m a pitcher, not a catcher. You can tell by my profession. 😉

  170. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 4:41 pm #

    Did anyone give Guy some Ben Gay after his violent cup check?

  171. agiledog May 5, 2011 at 4:41 pm #

    My checkerboard is in the shop.

    Sex it is, then.

  172. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm #

    A Catholic priest , a doctor, a rich businessman, and an Italian Guy from New York were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers in front of them.

    The Italian Guy from New York fumed,

    ‘What’s with those frickin’ jerks? We’re waiting fifteen minutes between shots!’

    The doctor chimed in, ‘I don’t know, but I’ve never seen such poor golf!’

    The rich businessman called out, ‘Move it, time is money!’

    The Catholic priest said, ‘Here comes the greens keeper. Let’s have a word with him. Excuse me, sir!’ said the priest, ‘What’s wrong with that group ahead of us? They’re rather slow, aren’t they?’

    The greens keeper replied, ‘Oh, yes. That’s a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime.’

    The group fell silent for a moment.

    The Catholic priest said, ‘That’s so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight.’

    The doctor said, ‘Good idea. I’m going to contact my ophthalmologist colleague and see if there’s anything that he might be able to do for them’

    The rich businessman replied, ‘I think I’ll donate $50,000 to the fire fighters union in honor of these brave souls !’

    The Italian guy from New York said, ‘Why the fuck can’t they play at night?

  173. Dick May 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm #

    Had the best negotiations ever with a customer today.

    They needed a bit of work done that would take me a couple of hours, so I quoted her $350.
    She then wanted to quibble over the price and knock it down to $300, to which I agreed. Then I handed her my card, which has a bit more info on it and she asked if I could do something else for her (another half hour, maybe) and I told her I generally would charge $125 per hour for the service.
    She looked at me and said, “Will you do it all for $500?”

    My answer, “Yep.”

  174. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:47 pm #

    47% of Detroiters are functionally illiterate.

    http://tinyurl.com/3lmg93g

    I have so very many words…. that they’ll never be able to read. Why waste the effort?

  175. Dick May 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm #

    Dumb fucking mooncrickets.

    How’s that, Jazz?

  176. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:49 pm #

    The Italian guy from New York said, ‘Why the fuck can’t they play at night?

    Shit, I’m going to hell for laughing so hard.

  177. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:49 pm #

    She looked at me and said, “Will you do it all for $500?”

    My answer, “Yep.”

    She should open a negotiating school. That’s a peculiar technique she’s got there. Maybe she could explain it to us.

  178. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:50 pm #

    “For other major urban areas, we are a little bit on the high side… We compare, slightly higher, to Washington D.C.’s urban population, in certain ZIP codes in Washington D.C. and in Cleveland,” she said.

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH – “A little bit on the high side”? 47%?

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

  179. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 4:51 pm #

    She looked at me and said, “Will you do it all for $500?”

    My answer, “Yep.”

    Dick keeps winning the internets.

  180. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 4:51 pm #

    Bin Laden’s death wasn’t revenge, it was a reckonin’:
    http://americandigest.org/mt-archives/terrorwar/september_10_2001_make_no.php

  181. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 4:52 pm #

    How’s that, Jazz?

    I can neither confirm nor deny that I am laughing myself incontinent.

  182. Dick May 5, 2011 at 4:53 pm #

    Dick keeps winning the internets.

    Trophies should be emailed to, bigdicksplace(at)yahoo(dot)com.

  183. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 5:00 pm #

    The deal with the Detroit illiteracy thing – it’s a choice. After ten years of living there, my impression is that the denizens view education as a tool of “the man,” that by getting an education, one cedes identity to a racial social paradigm that consigns certain segments to secondary status; by acquiring an education, one furthers the ends of the enemy (i.e., “the man”).

  184. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:01 pm #

    *tries to squeeze trophy through internet*

    Holy shit, this is tough….

  185. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 5:01 pm #

    BTW, everyone here is “the man” for purposes of the above elaboration.

  186. Jazz May 5, 2011 at 5:02 pm #

    Driving.

  187. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:03 pm #

    Jazz, education is not only viewed that way. It’s also viewed as betraying your race by becoming one of them. The term “oreo” comes to mind, among others.

  188. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:03 pm #

    Damnit, Chief! Now I’m forced to listen to old Sinatra tunes!

    Eh, could be worse….

    Aggie, keep pushing!

  189. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:08 pm #

    *listens to The Girl from Ipanema*

    WHEEEEEE!!!!!

  190. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:12 pm #

    I like the Gilberto/Getz version of that the best, I think.

  191. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 5:14 pm #

    Really? ‘Cause the Slayer version is what yanks my crank.

  192. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:14 pm #

    I do too, Dick. It’s smoother, IMO.

  193. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:15 pm #

    Ok, here’s your trophy, Dick!!!

  194. MCPO Airdale May 5, 2011 at 5:17 pm #

  195. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 5:17 pm #

    George W. Bush on the death of a terrorist mastermind:

  196. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:17 pm #

    BiW, post a link.

  197. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:18 pm #

    Ok, here’s your trophy, Dick!!!

    Yea me!!! I’m a wiener!

  198. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:18 pm #

    Sorry, but it was hard to fit a three-foot three piston asshammer trophy through to here.

  199. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:20 pm #

    Oh, man, Teresa…you HAD to link that ferretfuck in here??

    Gawd, I detest that fecalbrained asshole.

  200. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:21 pm #

    Is it time to pull a cork yet?

  201. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:24 pm #

    According to EST, it is, Dick.

    *gives Dick tequila*

    Start imbibing, honey 😉

  202. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 5:26 pm #

    Maybe I should just get fitted for a dress and a tiara.

    I still have my old Girl Scout badge sash and a broken mini-blind wand you can use to complete the ensemble….

  203. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:27 pm #

    Good deal. My fingers are all nice and bloody from the job I did this morning. Tequila will do nicely to blunt the annoyance.

  204. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 5:28 pm #

    Oh, man, Teresa…you HAD to link that ferretfuck in here??
    Gawd, I detest that fecalbrained asshole.

    Aw, c’mon – ya gotta admit that one was funny!

  205. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:37 pm #

    My fingers are all nice and bloody from the job I did this morning.

    You poor man…

    *kisses Dick’s boo boos*

    *waits for Peasants to pick up low hanging fruit*

  206. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:41 pm #

    Aggie, that shouldn’t take too long around this dump.

  207. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm #

    Osama’s Favorite Wife’s Passport has been found:

  208. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:48 pm #

    Mozilla/Firefox tell the DHS to pound a bag of sand up their asses.

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/54218316/Questions-to-Department-of-Homeland-Security-April-19-2011

  209. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:51 pm #

    Romo is getting married? I thought he was ghey??

  210. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:51 pm #

    From the comments at Althouse.

    MadisonMan said…

    Joke I heard today: The decision to withold the photo was a no-brainer.

  211. Dick May 5, 2011 at 5:52 pm #

    After Jessica Simpson, he should be.

  212. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 5:59 pm #

    Mozilla/Firefox tell the DHS to pound a bag of sand up their asses.

    That deserves a drink.

  213. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:00 pm #

    The decision to withold the photo was a no-brainer.

    So much for my DRINK!!!!

  214. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:13 pm #

    I WANT THAT DOG!!!!!

    WANT LIKE BURNING!!!!

  215. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:25 pm #

    Dick, with all the shite happening, are you going to add or amend the second book?

  216. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 6:41 pm #

    Terror alert based on poop found at bin Laden’s crib.

    Well, at least this should quiet down all of those calls for High-Speed Trains for a while. I mean, if OBL’s people want to attack them, why build more of them?

  217. Dick May 5, 2011 at 6:46 pm #

    Aggie, I’ve hit a monster dead space trying to tie in the stories on my second. So I imagine it’ll be the third book before this news gets in, but maybe not, we’ll see.
    I just want to magically finish it and make it interesting, but my mind says no.

  218. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:50 pm #

    if OBL’s people want to attack them, why build more of them?

    Shhhhhh!! Don’t tell Biden. His head can’t handle the logic.

    Aggie, I’ve hit a monster dead space trying to tie in the stories on my second.

    So, you are trying to make me read your book for the fifth time???

  219. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:54 pm #

    *clicks on Dick’s link*

    *prepares for Sinatra*

    *sits in stunned silence*

    *screams at kids to leave the kitchen*

    Um, nice link, Dick….

  220. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 6:55 pm #

    Never seen dental floss worn as clothing before…

  221. Dick May 5, 2011 at 6:58 pm #

    Technically, it was safe for work. Completely forgot about the kiddos in the kitchen.

    Me sooo sorry. I’ll pull it.

  222. Dick May 5, 2011 at 7:00 pm #

    Aggie, it’s not worthy of a second read, let alone a fifth.

  223. MCPO Airdale May 5, 2011 at 7:00 pm #

    Dick, you’re my hero! Uhhhhh, you too, Dick.

  224. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 7:02 pm #

    You didn’t have to pull it, Dick. I was able to handle it 😉

    And don’t sell yourself short. We enjoyed your writing, and look forward to the next book.

    And by “look forward”, I mean “get your ass in gear”!!!

    😀

  225. Dick May 5, 2011 at 7:04 pm #

    Wonder what Stinky’s doing right about now? Probably dinner…

  226. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 7:09 pm #

    Dick, you are so soft-hearted.

    He’s probably laughing inwardly, thinking how lacking these people are compared to you 🙂

  227. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 7:15 pm #

    Wonder what Stinky’s doing right about now? Probably dinner…

    Wishing for the umpteenth time that he had been the guy who got to pop a cap in Bin Laden’s noggin?

    Or not….

  228. Dick May 5, 2011 at 7:25 pm #

    I worry constantly about two things. My son and this nation. Honestly, everything else is gravy.

  229. Dick May 5, 2011 at 7:26 pm #

    Teresa, Donny’s not like me. He’d rather plan than execute.

  230. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX May 5, 2011 at 7:52 pm #

    OK, then – wishing for the umpteenth time that he’d been the badass who planned this operation and got all of his men back safely?

  231. Dick May 5, 2011 at 8:24 pm #

    This poat is deader than an open herp sore in a vial of alcohol.

  232. Dick May 5, 2011 at 8:43 pm #

    I’m gonna claim that I shot it, in its pajamas, while hiding behind its wife.

  233. roamy May 5, 2011 at 8:54 pm #

    At this rate, I won’t have any family left in a couple of years. Fuck.

  234. Dick May 5, 2011 at 8:59 pm #

    Oh, hell… What trouble are you getting into, Roamy?

  235. roamy May 5, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    Another one of my cousins passed away today, the one that went into a diabetic coma a couple of weeks ago. I knew this was coming – he developed pneumonia and kidney failure, but it’s still sad and frustrating. He was an Air Force veteran, so he will be buried with military honors, probably on Monday.

    In two years, I’ve lost my mom, my oldest brother, my sister-in-law, and two cousins. And it can’t be over, because my cousin’s mother is still alive at 90, and I have two aunts and an uncle in their 80’s. But still… ENOUGH.

  236. roamy May 5, 2011 at 9:11 pm #

    And my cousin Ronnie and next oldest brother better be watching their cholesterol or something, because no one of our generation has made it to 60 yet.

  237. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 9:24 pm #

    Shit, Roamy, I am so sorry 😦

  238. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 9:30 pm #

    😦

  239. Dick May 5, 2011 at 9:31 pm #

    Aww, Roamy. I’m so sorry. You and your family have my best wishes.

  240. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 9:42 pm #

    Thank you, everyone.

    **breaks out the wine and good chocolate.

  241. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 9:48 pm #

    *hugs Roamy*

    *gives Roamy her last Godiva chocolate bar*

  242. Dick May 5, 2011 at 9:49 pm #

    Herman Caine(sp) is the only one making sense in this debate tonight.

  243. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:00 pm #

    He usually does, Dick. I like Cain.

    I’m a hostage to Disney right now. Probably why I’m drinking.

  244. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:06 pm #

    I’m eating some kickass penne.

  245. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 10:07 pm #

    Aggie, thank you, but I have Ghiradelli. I’ll make it.

  246. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:10 pm #

    I’m eating some kickass penne.

    Usually I boil the penne until they can’t fight back, but whatever floats your boat.

  247. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:11 pm #

    I’m on my third tequila, which means I’m typing this while ripped.

  248. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:13 pm #

    I split atoms.

    With my mind.

  249. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:14 pm #

    Whoa, no typos? A true pro.

  250. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:20 pm #

    I just wrestled a crocodile, while putting out a fire in an orphanage.

  251. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:20 pm #

    Let me know if that qualifies for a trophy.

  252. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:22 pm #

    While singing tunes from ‘Annie’.

  253. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:22 pm #

    I just converted a liberal to conservatism.

  254. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:26 pm #

    I just wrestled a crocodile, while putting out a fire in an orphanage

    WTF kind of tequila are you drinking???

    Let me know if that qualifies for a trophy.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

    Dick?

  255. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:27 pm #

    I just converted a liberal to conservatism.

    Pray tell…..

  256. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:27 pm #

    Just made California fall off into the ocean.

    (you’ll read about it later)

  257. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:29 pm #

    Just made California fall off into the ocean.

    (you’ll read about it later)

    Gives Dick the Presidental Medal of Freedom.

  258. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:33 pm #

    Just made California fall off into the ocean.

    First he’s SuperDick, then he wins the internets, and now a Medal of Freedom…

    How do you compete with that???

  259. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:36 pm #

    I’m gonna see her in a 250 seat venue on Monday night.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsd3Z51MEyg

  260. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 10:37 pm #

    How do you compete with that???

    *farts*

  261. Dick May 5, 2011 at 10:40 pm #

    How do you compete with that???

    Making D.C. & New York implode, but I’m still working on that one.

  262. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:49 pm #

    I like Sarah Evans. You are lucky, BisW!

  263. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 10:56 pm #

    How do you compete with that???

    *farts*

    Someone read the email.

  264. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 10:57 pm #

    Someone read the email.

    Did you get my response?

  265. GuyS May 5, 2011 at 11:11 pm #

    I just had a good cup of coffee, some homemade cake, and told my wife (we were having a discussion) she was right! Time to go watch some NCIS and Scrubs. (While hoping to God, that BisW does not believe in dutch ovens while venting his gastro-intestinal misfortunes.

  266. Dick May 5, 2011 at 11:13 pm #

    Roamy, you need to be wrapped in warm blankets fresh from the dryer and smothered with love.

    G’night xtremely hawt milfs, winches, and babes who give us mere mortals a pulse worthy of the atomic clock.
    And of course, g’night to all you butt munchin’ homos as well. Shitbags…

  267. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 11:17 pm #

    G’night, Dick!!

    Guy, hope your birthday was awesome!

  268. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 11:19 pm #

    I like Sarah Evans. You are lucky, BisW!

    She’s hawt and she can sing.

    And I’ll be close enough that I’ll be able to count the beads of sweat on her forehead.

    I’m gonna have a damn good time.

  269. roamingfirehydrant May 5, 2011 at 11:28 pm #

    Thank you, Dick. (((hugs)))

  270. LC Aggie Sith May 5, 2011 at 11:29 pm #

    Time for bath and bed.

    Later taters!!!

  271. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere May 5, 2011 at 11:34 pm #

    Romy, the fact that you can still feel it acutely makes me sorry for your pain, but I admire the fact that you haven’t just shut down emotionally.

    I don’t know that I could do as well in the midst of such a cascade.

  272. GuyS May 5, 2011 at 11:47 pm #

    To all of you thanks for the good vibes. To Dick, have a good night and a better tomorrow. BisW, enjoy the concert … try not to give in to throwing your panties up on stage…that is sooo pass’e.

    Romy, I am the new kid on the block, so I don’t know you well enough to offer any valid words. But having the courage to share your pain here makes me think you will also have the courage to meet what ever fate happens to toss your way. You sound like someone with grit. And if nothing else you have a new admirer here.

    And on that note, you all have a good one, I am off to annoy the wife.

  273. roamingfirehydrant May 6, 2011 at 12:22 am #

    Courage to share my pain here? GuyS, these are my friends and some of the best support I could ask for.

  274. roamingfirehydrant May 6, 2011 at 8:23 am #

    Yay, new poat!

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