Australia FTW!!!

4 Apr

Australia, where the language spoken is “screaming”.

This it the world’s Thunderdome, my friend, and you are NOT Mad Max.

190 Responses to “Australia FTW!!!”

  1. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 7:36 pm #

    This poat sucks koala shit.

  2. Dick April 4, 2011 at 7:46 pm #

    Ummm… Koala poop makes a yummy breakfast cereal!

  3. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 7:49 pm #

    Not as yummy as kangaroo steak 😀

  4. roamingfirehydrant April 4, 2011 at 8:02 pm #

    Tie me kangaroo down, sport, tie me kangaroo down…

  5. Dick April 4, 2011 at 8:03 pm #

    Just remember kids. If you’ve ever said that life’s too short, YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG!

  6. Dick April 4, 2011 at 8:03 pm #

    Tie me kangaroo down, sport, tie me kangaroo down…

    Kinky…

  7. roamingfirehydrant April 4, 2011 at 8:30 pm #

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPu-C5vvzU4

    not only kinky, but I can’t hear this without hearing in my head the really rude guy in college who would ad-lib “fuck a wallaby” in the chorus.

  8. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 8:37 pm #

    Taking a little break. BIL and cousin-in-law should be in sometime tonight. Still have no idea when that funeral is. Thinking it’ll be maybe Friday. Daughter’s bringing the kids over in the morning for a couple of nights and their dad will pick them up late Wednesday night and take them out of town to that funeral on Thursday. Almost all my must do chores for guests are done. I did too much and I’m pooped.

    And don’t ask me to write a poat. I don’t do those anymore. 😉

  9. Ca Rin April 4, 2011 at 8:38 pm #

    I think Aggie is the official poater over here.

  10. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 8:43 pm #

    As long as I’m not the official pooter, Carin.

  11. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 8:48 pm #

    And I’ll have you know it was BisW who pushed PattyAnn’s last poat like a cheap prom dress.

  12. gmland April 4, 2011 at 9:03 pm #

    What is the world record for being overcome by a stomach virus? Cuz I think I broke it…

  13. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    What is the world record for being overcome by a stomach virus?

    My kid got sick 25 mins after eating bad fruit salad. If you broke that record, you’re a wuss… 😉

  14. roamingfirehydrant April 4, 2011 at 9:13 pm #

    (((hugs PA)))

    Rest while you can, hon.

  15. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 9:23 pm #

    Okay. I give. SIL just called and Hospice told her to tell anyone wanting to come say goodbye to her husband to do it now.

  16. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 4, 2011 at 9:56 pm #

    PA,

    I really don’t know what to say to that.

  17. Dick April 4, 2011 at 9:57 pm #

    Best get in the car. Not good.

  18. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:00 pm #

    Dick, John’s brother and his cousin should be here any time; they drove from Virginia. It’s their sister’s husband. We’ll wait on them and drive them to the sister’s. The other uncle is the uncle of my dead husband, that’s why I’m keeping the kids for a couple of days.
    Anyway, I’m tired of this crap.

  19. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 10:00 pm #

    Holy God, PattyAnn. I’m so sorry.

  20. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:05 pm #

    Thank you to each and every one of you for letting me talk about all this here. I know it’s a downer and I’m sorry, but I need you 🙂

  21. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:07 pm #

    Tell us anything you want to, PA.
    Talk about anything.
    We love you to no end and always will.

  22. roamingfirehydrant April 4, 2011 at 10:07 pm #

    PA, that’s what we are here for.

    (((HUGS)))

  23. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:08 pm #

    So, I’m guessing me and you at a local Starbuck’s at 6am is out?

  24. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:09 pm #

    *smooches!!

  25. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:13 pm #

    Dick, I’ll meet you at Starbuck’s in Lake Lewisville at 2:30.
    AM
    *snicker. I think the best Lake Lewisville has is the Quik-Trip frozen coffee slushee*

  26. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 10:16 pm #

    PattyAnn, please type here all you want and need.

    Email us if need be.

  27. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 4, 2011 at 10:17 pm #

    Tell us anything you want to, PA.
    Talk about anything.
    We love you to no end and always will.

    You keep talking like that, and no one will be afraid of you, you scary old softie.

  28. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:24 pm #

    ^ Don’t worry, BiW, he’s gonna delete that comment before anyone else sees it 🙂

  29. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:28 pm #

    Got the last phone call from the kiddo a few minutes ago.
    He told me there’s a very large, very angry black man, who happened to be a Chief Petty Officer, screaming at them and letting them know they got one minute for a final phone call.
    I let him know he should fear for his life.

  30. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:29 pm #

    I also let him know we loved him.

  31. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:31 pm #

    Dick, I’ll meet you at Starbuck’s in Lake Lewisville at 2:30am

    Too damn cold to skinny dip.

  32. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 10:31 pm #

    I let him know he should fear for his life.

    Good luck to Stinky!!

  33. xbradtc April 4, 2011 at 10:33 pm #

    They give them a last phone call now?

    Geez.

    Kids today.

    Still, Dick, it should be nice in Chicago when you go up for his graduation from Boot Camp.

  34. gmland April 4, 2011 at 10:34 pm #

    Heartfelt condolences PA…

    Proud handshake from one father to another, Dick.

  35. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:38 pm #

    Stinky calling you with his one minute means a lot, Dick. You be special.

  36. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:38 pm #

    Xbad, when did this graduation crap come into play?
    It damn sure wasn’t around for me. The DI simply told us we passed and to get our asses to Sand Hill within the hour or we’d be dead meat.

  37. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:39 pm #

    I’m not swimming, Dick. And you know it’s a town and a lake.

  38. xbradtc April 4, 2011 at 10:40 pm #

    [[[*HUGS*]]] for PattyAnn

  39. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 10:41 pm #

    You get to graduate now??

    Wow…boot camp has changed.

  40. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:44 pm #

    Where are they? I made pulled pork and everything.

  41. xbradtc April 4, 2011 at 10:48 pm #

    1. It’s the Navy. They love a parade.
    2. I went to OSUT, so basic and AIT was wrapped into one 13 week program. We were supposed to have a parade, but it rained, so we had graduation in one of the theaters in Harmony Church. My mom was in AL visiting her sister, so they both drove over for it.

  42. PattyAnn April 4, 2011 at 10:50 pm #

    Okay–going! SYL

  43. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:50 pm #

    I did basic at the Church and AIT at Sand Hill. Much confusion, but it worked.

  44. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:51 pm #

    And we did have a grad ceremony thing for Infantry school, but no relatives were there. Just brass.

  45. Dick April 4, 2011 at 10:52 pm #

    Be good, PA.

    G’night, folks.

  46. xbradtc April 4, 2011 at 10:53 pm #

    Nowadays, every basic training or OSUT has a graduation ceremony, and family is invited.

    Even the Air Force.

  47. LC Aggie Sith April 4, 2011 at 11:25 pm #

    So, who is left here to talk to?

  48. Ca Rin April 5, 2011 at 7:22 am #

    Wakey wakey.

    ‘cept PA. She can sleep in this morning.

  49. Dick April 5, 2011 at 7:51 am #

    Good morning, Car in and farm animals!

  50. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 7:57 am #

    Good morning!!!

    *makes a pot of coffee*

  51. roamingfirehydrant April 5, 2011 at 8:09 am #

    **mainlines caffeine

  52. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:13 am #

    I wonder if the Navy placed a chocolate on Stinky’s pillow last night and tucked him in?
    Surely they got breakfast in bed this morning.

  53. roamingfirehydrant April 5, 2011 at 8:17 am #

    Dick, that’s the Air Force.

  54. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:19 am #

    that’s the Air Force.

    But the recruiter said…

  55. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:21 am #

    Dick, that’s the Air Force.

    No shit.

  56. roamingfirehydrant April 5, 2011 at 8:43 am #

    Off to work, hope y’all have a great day. (((hugs)))

  57. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:47 am #

    Myself as well. You kids don’t break anything while I’m gone and don’t be having a bunch of friends over.

  58. agiledog April 5, 2011 at 8:51 am #

    Good morning, all.

    PattyAnn, if you come back on and get to read this:

    My condolonces for you and all of your family – sounds like it is a tough patch for you folks. Feel free to vent here whenever you need.

  59. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:51 am #

    You kids don’t break anything while I’m gone and don’t be having a bunch of friends over

    YOU’RE NOT MY DAD!!!!

  60. GMLand April 5, 2011 at 8:51 am #

    *waddles in holding stomach*

    how is everyone this morning?

  61. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:52 am #

    *gives GML a tummy rub*

    Are you ok?? What happened?

  62. GMLand April 5, 2011 at 9:00 am #

    eh, stomach virus. Feels like I got punched in the gut.

  63. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 9:05 am #

    Dick, that’s the Air Force.

    No shit.

    Heh, that’s funny, Aggie, since you have basic in town.

  64. agiledog April 5, 2011 at 9:06 am #

    Feels like I got punched in the gut.

    Can’t imagine that Aggie’s rubbing it is helping it feel any better – unless she is wearing that Nurse outfit again. 🙂

  65. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 9:06 am #

    eh, stomach virus. Feels like I got punched in the gut.

    Sorry to hear that, GM. Want some chili?

  66. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 9:09 am #

    Heh, that’s funny, Aggie, since you have basic in town.

    And that’s why I know 😀

    unless she is wearing that Nurse outfit again.

    It’s at the cleaners 😉

  67. GMLand April 5, 2011 at 9:10 am #

    Want some chili?

    – – – –

    Sure. Need anything painted?

  68. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 9:17 am #

    Also, someone go over to Wisconsin and wake up all the Republicans and tell them to go vote.

  69. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 9:29 am #

    I called a few friends in Wisconsin this morning, J’Ames. One of them is an election judge.

    This is going to be an interesting day….

  70. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 10:04 am #

    Good morning! Anyone need some sunshine?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXvJ8UquYoo#t=1m28s

  71. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 10:10 am #

    Eddiebear brought this one out, thought y’all would like to take a gander at it: Patterico (Stranahan post): The Right’s Missing Organizational Machinery

    I’m REALLY liking the cut of Stranahan’s jib.

  72. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 10:35 am #

    Good Gregalogue here: Big Hollywood (Greg Gutfeld): Universities Could Do Worse Than Have Snookie as a Guest Speaker … And Have!

    So the pint-sized pasta-pooper known as Snookie was paid 32 grand by Rutgers University to speak at New Jersey’s largest college.

    Heh.

  73. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 10:36 am #

    Hugs to all this morning. Dying BIL is only taking about 3 breaths a minute now and his blood pressure is very low. He’s been very ill for years. I think he’s just too tired to fight it anymore.
    BIL and cousin-in-law have gone north to be in the heart of things up there, John’s off to work and the grandkids will be overwhelming me anytime now. Right now I’m sitting here playing on the computer and drinking coffee.
    Did anyone see the new RNC head on Today show this morning? Meredith V. was trying to carry Obama’s water and he *corrected* her every time. So much better than Michael Steele.
    Still no official word on nephew, but they’re tending to think he had a heart attack in his sleep.

  74. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 10:36 am #

    Like my Jazz impersonation, everyone?

  75. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    Sad news, PattyAnn. Hope you’re holding up! Best wishes to you.

  76. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 10:38 am #

    Speaking of Snooki, is it my imagination, or is her body shape odd, rather pear-ish? She looks like a leather Weeble with tits (or tit-like protruberances).

  77. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 10:39 am #

    J’Ames, I had to look at your avatar to make sure it wasn’t Jazz 😀

    PattyAnn, make sure you rest today, and don’t run yourself ragged.

    I don’t watch Today, but I may have to find that clip!!

  78. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 10:41 am #

    What the hell, PA? I didn’t realize you were in the middle of a death-idemic. Jiminy christmas, I’m exponentially more saddened to hear of your losses. I’ll just throw another metric assload of prayers into the hopper for you. Dammit. 😦

  79. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 10:45 am #

    I had no idea who she was until I heard Reuters paid her to speak, but yes, she is rather “heavier” in the bottom than the top, though that could be a mirage due to the clothing she wears.

    And really, kids will learn more from a bimbo than from a elitist writer.

  80. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 10:49 am #

    Great. The toilet in the girls’ bathroom upstairs is leaking. All over the floor. And down onto the floor below. Through the sheet rock that Mr. TiFW just patched up from the last drippage.

    Mr. TiFW thought the tank was leaking – nay, not so! The water was shut off last night and the tank emptied. Apparently the leak is at the turn-off valve, and it’s been happily dripping water ALL.NIGHT.LONG.

    Will Mr. TiFW let me call a plumber? No – he’s an engineer; he’s gonna fix it himself. So now, I’m gonna get to hear how he had to take off work to come fix the toilet and he’s not gonna make any overtime this week, and he’s gonna have to make up the time that he took off so that he doesn’t have to use vacation…..(Can you tell this has happened before?)

    I mean, it’s not like the man doesn’t make enough money – we can pay a plumber to come and fix the darn thing. They just never “Do it right”…..

    Good times.
    Good times.

  81. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 10:52 am #

    I would pay for a plumber, even if I were Mr. Plumr…

  82. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 10:52 am #

    J’Ames, you’re making a very good quasi-Jazz this morning. Both good articles.

    Jazz, I love your wordplay with death-idemic. I texted it to John and he laughed. Said he was going to use it.

    Aggie, I worked my ass off yesterday getting the house in order so today all I plan to do is feed and play with the kids. And all of them have already said they want a jacuzzi bath today. Whee! Bubbles everywhere!

  83. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 10:55 am #

    Teresa, John is very good at figuring out how many hours he would have to pay to have someone else do a repair and comparing how long it would take him to make it. We always call a plumber.

  84. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 10:57 am #

    OH CRAP – I posted my comment before reading all of the comments, and now I feel lower than a snake for complaining about a toilet leak when PattyAnn has all of her stuff that’s been dumped in her lap.

    PA – I’m in Fort Worth. If you need anything, you just give me a holler (if you have any of my e-mails, my phone numbers are on there). In the meantime, great big Texas-sized hugs and lots of prayers are coming your way.

    Love you, sweetheart!

  85. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 10:57 am #

    figuring out how many hours he would have to pay to have someone else do a repair and comparing how long it would take him to make it. We always call a plumber.

    This. +1000. Unless it’s really simple, then I do it.

  86. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 11:01 am #

    Teresa, no worries. This is life. And death. They both happen, just not normally 3 in one week. Thank you again for offering help–I know you’d do it in a New York minute and I appreciate that. I’m coping pretty well at the moment 🙂 It helps to have fake friends to talk to.

    J’Ames, if it’s really simple, John knows I’ll do it. Hahahaha.

  87. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 11:03 am #

    PA, sometimes I can convince Paul to do that, and sometimes there’s no talking to him. We got burned by a plumber on a major job in our house (it involved 100+ year old wood floors which were butchered beyond repair after assurances that wouldn’t happen, and things that we have had to go back in and repair that weren’t done right), so I think he’s rather skittish about plumbers at this point.

    My dad is an engineer, so I’m used to it. Almost everything in our house has been fixed/remodeled exclusively by us – the plumbing was the first time we’d used outside help….

    I did finally convince Mr. TiFW that it was worth it to just take the cars in to have them serviced. He still doesn’t like it, but I just do it and let him bitch afterwards! (“Yeah, yeah, it was a coupla hundred dollars for all of this work; took them all of 2 hours to do it.” *grumble*grumble*grumble* “Well, OK…”)

  88. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:09 am #

    I love your wordplay with death-idemic. I texted it to John and he laughed. Said he was going to use it.

    I’m gratified and a little squeamish that y’all found the humor in my . . . humor? 🙂

    /I’ve gotta learn to be a little more respectful, but I’m glad you took it in the spirit I intended. 🙂

  89. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 11:12 am #

    Jacuzzi baths FTW!!!

    I used to throw all of my kids when they were little into the jacuzzi tub we had while stationed in NC. An itty bitty bit of bubblebath and WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

  90. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 11:14 am #

    Ace: Breaking: White House Calls Boehner To Reject CR

    It’s on. Let’s see the spin start.

  91. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:26 am #

    It’s on. Let’s see the spin start.

    Go, Niggardlies!!!!

  92. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:27 am #

    What’s a niggardly gotta do to get some lunch around here?

  93. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 11:31 am #

    I understand about Paul being skittish, Teresa. The first plumber we had here was horrible. The next time we needed one, we tried another. He has been terrific.

    Jazz, if you can’t see the humor in things, then you really are hopeless. That’s always been my mantra. I actually posted on FB yesterday my funeral wishes: everyone who attends must wear a robe or jammies and slippers. Period. It and the comments all gave me a laugh. Cathy has no jammies, so we’re going to duct tape me to the hoe and everyone just gets in the hot tub at her house. Yes, definitely irreverent but gave me smiles.

  94. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 11:34 am #

    Aggie, all you have to do is wave the bubble bath at the jacuzzi and they will be overflowing onto the floor. But the sheer joy they get from it is worth the clean up.

  95. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:37 am #

    You know what’s really funny? My application of “niggardly” relates to the people who oppose the guy who would take racial offense at the term.

    Cheap Racial Theatricks and The Theater of the Absurd Present
    “Race-Based Politics and The Democrat Mantra”

    Dem: You’re raaaaacist!

    Niggardlies: No, we’re cheap.

    Dem: Well, you sound raaaaacist! And being cheap is raaaacist, too!

    Niggardlies: More raaaaacist than the guy who charges racism in absence of any proof?

    Dem: Yes! RAAAAACISTS!!!!

    Fin

  96. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 11:40 am #

    RedBankGreen: FOX: SPRINGTEEN [sic] & BON JOVI ARE FARMERS?

    Frakkin hypocrites. Assholes. Insert insulting expletive here. I wouldn’t pee on those two if they were on fire. Time to break my Springsteen albums and CDs.

  97. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:45 am #

    Hahahahaha!

    Want some Bon Jovi fun? You think Bon Jovi sucks now?Wait until you compare these two faggy vids and see who he sounds like:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5CeX5VEo10c

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qesM36lTd6Y

  98. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 11:47 am #

    Bon Jovi’s really an ugly lesbian.

  99. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 11:48 am #

    I actually posted on FB yesterday my funeral wishes: everyone who attends must wear a robe or jammies and slippers.

    Ha! I saw that! I told Hubby I wanted no funeral. Just a big party with plenty of food and booze and for everyone to wear something red, and the gals to wear red lipstick, and the kids to have a petting zoo complete with goats and ponies, and maybe a llama, and a band that plays Big Band music.

    He told me it would be infinitely easier to just cremate me and dump my ashes in the river. I told him fine, as long as there was a band and booze and a llama.

  100. agiledog April 5, 2011 at 12:22 pm #

    as long as there was a band and booze and a llama

    Kinky. I like.

  101. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 12:28 pm #

    Haha, Aggie, I’d go for your plan but I know John would need a funeral service for me. So I figure if I have to have one, at least everyone should be comfortable. But I think I might have to have a llama, too 🙂 You know they spit, don’t you?

  102. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:34 pm #

    For PattyAnn:
    http://teresainfortworth.wordpress.com/2011/04/05/the-glory-of-springtime/
    Hope it brings a small measure of cheer at a sad time.

  103. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 12:36 pm #

    Aw, thanks, Teresa. Nice post. Your roses are beautiful.

  104. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 12:37 pm #

    Motherfucker, Lindsey Graham is a vacuous motherfucker. Can we have an Uncivil night out and have a blanket party with this stupid sumbitch?

    http://tinyurl.com/429jq6w

  105. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:40 pm #

    We have a friend who raises llamas – she never had kids, so now she has 16 of ’em (and counting)….

    When she got her 1st one (as a little baby one), we all threw a “baby” shower for her, complete with cake and a watering trough (a gift from our group of friends).

    We conspired with her POSSLQ (they’ve never gotten married, but they might as well be) – he was in on the whole thing. It was lots of fun!

  106. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 12:42 pm #

    I have no idea of what your POSSLQ acronym means, TiFW.

  107. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:43 pm #

    Can we have an Uncivil night out and have a blanket party with this stupid sumbitch?

    I vote we have a “Wet Blanket Party” – wet as in “bottom-of-the-river” and/or “waterboarding” wet.

  108. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:45 pm #

    POSSLQ – “Persons of the Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters”.

    It was a term bandied about by the IRS as a possible box to check off on 1040 forms, I believe.

    Yet another one of those completely useless pieces of trivia that stuck to one of my brain cells years ago and never left. I can’t remember what I had for breakfast, but I can remember THAT….

  109. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:48 pm #

    Correction – it was the Census Bureau:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/POSSLQ

    I just remembered reading the silly poems back in the day, and thinking how only a government agency could come up with something so stupid….

  110. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 12:50 pm #

    Oh, of course I know they spit. That’s part of the fun 😉

    One of my fondest memories is driving up to Hubby’s grandparents, and passing a beautiful dairy farm. The kids would get all excited and yell “COWS, MOMMA!!!” and Hubby would say, “Not cows…LLAMAS!!!” And the kids would look again, and look at him like he was an idiot, and say, “Daddy, those are cows. Llamas have long necks.” And he would say, “Llamas drink beer???” And they would just die laughing at him.

    And that’s why I need a llama at my service 😀

  111. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:53 pm #

    What a cute story, Aggie! You would, of course, have to include that in your memorial service so that people would understand the significance of the cloven-hoofed guest –

  112. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 12:54 pm #

    The part that I remembered best (probably because it sounded like Dr. Seuss):

    And everything we will confess;
    Yes, even to the IRS.
    Some day on what we both may earn,
    Perhaps we’ll file a joint return.
    You’ll share my pad, my taxes, joint;
    You’ll share my life – up to a point!
    And that you’ll be so glad to do,
    Because you’ll be my POSSLQ.

    http://2000clicks.com/Graeme/LangPoetryFunnyPOSSLQ.htm

  113. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 12:59 pm #

    Hahaha, love the story, Aggie.

    And LG and Biden must have been separated at birth.

  114. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 1:00 pm #

    You would, of course, have to include that in your memorial service so that people would understand the significance of the cloven-hoofed guest

    The cloven-hooved guest at my funeral will be there to collect my soul….

  115. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 1:00 pm #

    And LG and Biden must have been separated at birth.

    Holy shit…that explains so much!!!!

  116. PattyAnn April 5, 2011 at 1:07 pm #

    Aggie, I was thinking conjoined twins with one brain, but didn’t say it because I didn’t want to be insensitive.
    Kids are here but they’re wanting to watch old cartoons. Tweety bird, Tom & Jerry…at least it’s not Powder Puff Girls.

  117. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 1:18 pm #

    The cloven-hooved guest at my funeral will be there to collect my soul….

    WTF did you do to Bambi to piss him off??

  118. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 1:36 pm #

    Motherfucker, Lindsey Graham is a vacuous motherfucker. Can we have an Uncivil night out and have a blanket party with this stupid sumbitch?

    http://tinyurl.com/429jq6w

    Thanks. Now I know what my next post will be about.

    The sad thing is that Lindsey almost gets it, kind of like a man in the fog who is trying desperately to get to the door. He’s blindly reaching for the knob, and coming up empty every single time.

  119. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 1:43 pm #

    And LG and Biden must have been separated at birth.
    Nah – they’re just joined at the hip IYKWIMAITTYD….

    He’s blindly reaching for the knob…
    Must.Not.Give.Into.Tempta….
    Aw, screw it – everyone knows that Miss Lindsey ALWAYS finds the knob.

  120. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

    Aw, screw it – everyone knows that Miss Lindsey ALWAYS finds the knob.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

  121. Dick April 5, 2011 at 2:18 pm #

    Okay, my day’s over.
    Where’s the Chief been lately?

  122. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 2:24 pm #

    I don’t know, Dick. haven’t seen him at FB either.

    How was your day? Is it time for tequila?

  123. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 2:28 pm #

    Okay, my day’s over.

    Slacker.

  124. Car in April 5, 2011 at 2:29 pm #

    Yea, where has he been?

    When was the last siting?

    I’ve got his phone number.

  125. Dick April 5, 2011 at 2:30 pm #

    Betcha I worker harder than you did, BiW!
    Aggie, gonna wait til around 5pm before I pull a cork.

  126. Dick April 5, 2011 at 2:31 pm #

    Car in, I got him in speed dial ready to harass.

  127. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 2:34 pm #

    Well, well – speaking of cloven feet and soul collectors, here’s Dick! 😛

  128. Dick April 5, 2011 at 2:35 pm #

    Hey, Jazz. How’s the unit hangin’?

  129. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 2:45 pm #

    low and to the left, dick. it’s been a rough couple of weeks, and there’s no let-up on the horizon. my work life sucks. my home life sucks. my personal life is getting more complicated. AND it seems i’ve developed a recurrent case of insomnia. life kind of blows right now.

  130. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 2:46 pm #

    Besides that, though, everything’s peachy. It could be worse, too, as the travails recounted by our friends here illustrate in spades.

  131. Car in April 5, 2011 at 2:48 pm #

    Well, Jazz, at least we’ve got this great weather.

    *cuts self.

  132. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 2:59 pm #

    life kind of blows right now

    You are also in my thoughts and prayers, Jazz.

    Well, Jazz, at least we’ve got this great weather.

    I reiterate….

  133. Dick April 5, 2011 at 3:02 pm #

    Jazz, need me to Fed Ex a hooker and a bottle of tequila?
    If I can get the lil’ tramp to fit in the box, I will.

  134. Dick April 5, 2011 at 3:07 pm #

    Anybody here fly Southwest Airlines and know the difference in between Business Select – Anytime – Wanna Getaway fares?

  135. GMLand April 5, 2011 at 3:15 pm #

    life kind of blows right now.

    – –

    always darkest before the dawn. Keep your chin up and keep up the research, I have people counting on me!!!!

  136. clintbird April 5, 2011 at 3:16 pm #

    Go for the best price, Dick.

  137. GMLand April 5, 2011 at 3:17 pm #

    *notices the air is rather fresh around here*

    anyone heard from Chief?

  138. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 3:18 pm #

    Thanks, Aggie.

    Dick, the hooker would be great (if she’s clean). I’d just use the tequila to degrease my tools, though, so don’t waste a good bottle of agave juice. Thanks!

  139. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 3:25 pm #

    Anybody here fly Southwest Airlines and know the difference in between Business Select – Anytime – Wanna Getaway fares?

    I think the difference is whether you get to sit IN or close to the D.B. Cooper seat. Of course, “in” will be the least expensive, ’cause you’re obviously not landing with the plane. “Close to” exposes you to the vacuum at the open rear compartment door, with a chance of ejection, and the most expensive fare is virtually guarantees your safe return to terra firma.

  140. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 3:28 pm #

    The wanna-get-away fares are non-refundable, and usually the cheapest if booked well ahead of time.

    Business is the most expensive and you can get refunds if you need to cancel.

    Anytime is also as expensive, but you determine when you wish to fly. You buy the ticket, and can choose a date later, I believe.

  141. Dick April 5, 2011 at 3:28 pm #

    I think I’m gonna give in on that Boot Camp graduation nonsense and fly up to Chicago for the show. But I wanna go cheap.
    (wonders what Bob’s airlines is charging roundtrip from Dallas to Chicago?)

  142. Jay in Ames April 5, 2011 at 3:37 pm #

    I think Bob needs a stewardess, so you can get employee discount.

    Although the skirt might mean no one else will fly.

  143. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 3:41 pm #

    If you go to Chicago, Dick, and will have a minute to get out, I might consider making a run down to have lunch or dinner with you. My brother and his bitch wife live in Chicago by Lincoln Park. My sister lives somewhere downtown, too.

  144. Dick April 5, 2011 at 3:56 pm #

    Jazz, Navy Boot Camp is ten miles north of Chicago.
    I’ll probably give in and fly up, just not sure of when yet.
    Somewhere around the first week of May, I think.

  145. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 4:02 pm #

    Betcha I worker harder than you did, BiW!

    Maybe, but did you handle a contract dispute, a busines purchase and sale, review the wonky accounting of an estate, discuss a serious tax problem with a client, fire off a nasty gram, and review 15 years of corporate records for a board of directors grant of authority before lunch?

    I didn’t think so.

  146. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 4:02 pm #

    Well, I can’t get to St. Louis, so Chicago would be a nice distraction. I’ll hit you up in a few weeks.

  147. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 4:08 pm #

    I know you’ll be busy, too, Dick. Don’t feel pressured to hang out with me.

  148. beasn April 5, 2011 at 4:50 pm #

    Flashy sign at the corner Walgreens…

    “Got ugly toenails? We’ve got piggy paste.”

    WTF?

  149. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 4:56 pm #

    BEASN!!!!!!!

    And how are the piggies??

    And WTF is piggy paste??

  150. Dick April 5, 2011 at 5:03 pm #

    Maybe, but did you handle a contract dispute, a busines purchase and sale, review the wonky accounting of an estate, discuss a serious tax problem with a client, fire off a nasty gram, and review 15 years of corporate records for a board of directors grant of authority before lunch?

    Nope. But I did lay some brick and make it purty!

  151. Dick April 5, 2011 at 5:04 pm #

    Jazz, I got no clue what they’ll have planned for the parents.

  152. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 5:08 pm #

    So, brick got laid by Dick?

  153. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 5:15 pm #

  154. Dick April 5, 2011 at 5:33 pm #

    Well, after chatting with Kelly, the graduation thing has been settled. I’ll be attending.

    Good tune Teresa.
    Aggie, A dick laid brick.

  155. Dick April 5, 2011 at 5:35 pm #

    I’m easy.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIRGNzVIz6Y

  156. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 5:42 pm #

    Hahahahaha! I love the tears of liberals. They just don’t fucking understand how decisions can be made in an emotional vacuum.

    Both Thomas and Scalia have produced what can only be described as a master class in human apathy. Their disregard for the facts of Thompson’s thrashed life and near-death emerges as a moral flat line. Scalia opens his concurrence with a swipe at Ginsburg’s “lengthy excavation of the trial record” and states that “the question presented for our review is whether a municipality is liable for a single Brady violation by one of its prosecutors.” But only by willfully ignoring that entire trial record can he and Thomas reduce the entire constitutional question to a single misdeed by a single bad actor.

    http://tinyurl.com/3rbrv2t

    Oh, do I have plenty to say on that, but I think the stupidity there is rank enough to wilt foliage and peel paint and needs little explication.

    /What does Mohammad call children’s petting zoos?

    x

    x

    x

    Brothels.

  157. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 5:44 pm #

    If you haven’t read former Planned Parenthood clinic director Abby Johnson’s latest essay, it’s worth your time.

    http://tinyurl.com/3dh9w5j

  158. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm #

    From a Columbia classmate of Obama’s, Obama just might be a socialist…

    http://tinyurl.com/3p7gewy

    Read it – it’s full of Jeff Foxworthy-esque comparisons that you will enjoy.

  159. Zelda April 5, 2011 at 5:49 pm #

    Hey Dick – I think Southwest is having a huge sale right now because of their plane breaking.

  160. Dick April 5, 2011 at 5:55 pm #

    Thanks, Sweet Z!
    In other news, I just checked my email and came up empty again.

  161. Zelda April 5, 2011 at 5:57 pm #

    I’m a good girl, I am! Also I am sober. 🙂

  162. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 6:01 pm #

    Me, too, Zelda. 10 years sober. It ain’t what it’s cracked up to be, but it’s a hell of a lot better than the alternative for me.

  163. Jazz April 5, 2011 at 6:01 pm #

    Driving. Later.

  164. Zelda April 5, 2011 at 6:03 pm #

    Sobriety can’t do me any harm. Dick’ll tell ya.

  165. Dick April 5, 2011 at 6:06 pm #

    No I won’t. Never!

  166. Dick April 5, 2011 at 6:58 pm #

    The tards are eating their young again.

  167. scottw April 5, 2011 at 7:28 pm #

    Hewwo?

  168. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 7:31 pm #

    *slides Scott a beer*

    Welcome, stranger.

  169. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 7:31 pm #

    Debbie Wasserman Schultz tapped to be the new DNC chair. This is not a joke. I repeat: this is NOT a joke:
    http://weaselzippers.us/2011/04/05/obama-picks-debbie-wasserman-schultz-as-dnc-chair/

  170. scottw April 5, 2011 at 7:36 pm #

    Thanks BIW.

  171. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 7:37 pm #

    The tards are eating their young again.

    Of course, ignoring that Congress would have to make some of those promises a reality, not IWon Empty Armani.

  172. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 7:38 pm #

    Debbie Wasserman Schultz tapped to be the new DNC chair. This is not a joke. I repeat: this is NOT a joke:
    http://weaselzippers.us/2011/04/05/obama-picks-debbie-wasserman-schultz-as-dnc-chair/

    Ron Brown unavailable for comment.

  173. scottw April 5, 2011 at 7:39 pm #

    Teresa I love the pick. Debbie Wasserman-Shultz should be on TV 24-7.

  174. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 7:40 pm #

    Howdy Scott and Zelda.

    Am I to understand Dick wants pics of your bewbs, Zelda??

    Huh….

    *wonders if there’s a “bewbs” tab*

  175. Teresa in Fort Worth, TX April 5, 2011 at 7:42 pm #

    Oh, I love it, too Scott – she’s gonna give Howard Dean a run for the title of “Who’s Batshittier Crazy?”

    I’m gonna need to get LOTS more popcorn….

  176. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 7:43 pm #

    *wonders if there’s a “bewbs” tab*

    Right next to the blogroll.

  177. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 7:45 pm #

    I saw the pic and my first thought was that she was trying really hard not to swallow what some guy just left behind in her mouth.

  178. scottw April 5, 2011 at 7:53 pm #

    Debbie wash-yer-mouth-first.

  179. Blackiswhite, Imperial Consigliere April 5, 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    Debbie Don’t Breathe on Me.

    Eeewwww.

    Drive time.

  180. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:06 pm #

    *looks at Weasel Zippers link*

    *throws up a little*

    You just know she is going to have to out-do the Dean Scream™ 😉

  181. gmland April 5, 2011 at 8:07 pm #

    181th

  182. gmland April 5, 2011 at 8:08 pm #

    Cripes!

  183. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:09 pm #

    You drunk yet, GML?

  184. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:28 pm #

    The most popular girl in school?

  185. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:30 pm #

    Hey Scott, how ya doing?

  186. scottw April 5, 2011 at 8:33 pm #

    April looks good.

  187. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:36 pm #

    April looks good.

    Awesome news indeed!!!

  188. Dick April 5, 2011 at 8:39 pm #

    Very good news! I’m slammed for the next two weeks, and probably longer.

  189. LC Aggie Sith April 5, 2011 at 8:56 pm #

    NEW POAT!!!!!!

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